"Did you hear about Blake Edwards? He was the guy that did all those Pink Panther movies with Peter Sellars. What was the name of that movie where Peter Sellars played all those different characters?. Eddie Murphy played a bunch of characters in the Nutty Professor. That was a remake of that Jerry Lewis movie. He's still doing those telethons for that disease. I wonder if they will ever find a cure for cancer? The lady down the street was a Cancer. Her husband was a Capricorn. Boy, could that guy drink! One time he was so drunk, he walked into our house thinking it was his..."
And finally, about a half hour later, she would say, "He died the other day." Meaning Blake Edwards, but by this time, I have forgotten who she had started talking about. If I were to ask who died, she would get mad saying I'm not paying attention to her.
Of course, that particular scenario would never happen. I would be the one who tells her about Blake Edwards. It is my job in our relationship to keep track of who is dead, when it happened and by what means. When we watch an old movie, it is my duty to point out the actors and relay the current status of their mortality. On a side note, if I don't recognize the actor, I will substitute another actor's name. "That's Johnny Depp playing the Yankee who sets fire to Atlanta in Gone With the Wind. He's still living." When Linda calls my bluff by saying Johnny Depp wasn't alive when they made Gone With the Wind, I simply respond with two letters: "C.G." That's "computer graphics" to those that don't know. Hey, if Tom Hanks can shake Kennedy's hand in Forest Gump, then Johnny Depp can burn Atlanta in Gone With the Wind.
Johnny Depp leading horse and buggy in Gone With the Wind.
James Cameron, the director of Avatar, the Titanic and the Terminator, stated that with computer graphics, it is now possible to have any actor in any movie. Cary Grant, Bette Davis and Humphrey Bogart can once again grace the silver screen, starring opposite Robert Downy, Julia Roberts, Brad Pitt or any actor of your choosing. It is completely possible. All you need is a script, a director and a 100 million dollars. In fact, you don't even need the real George Clooney for your movie. The graphics department can edit his image in.
In closing, I would like to get back to Blake Edwards. If you ever get a chance to see "S.O.B.," do so. It is a 1981 film by Blake Edwards that stars his wife, Julie Andrews, and William Holden. It is one of the funniest films ever made about making films. Julie Andrews plays an aging actress who has to decide if she is willing to expose her bosom in a movie before she gets too old to have her exposure appreciated. The tension is titillating. If you enjoyed the Pink Panther movies, then you will enjoy "S.O.B." Basically the same type of humor, only more risqué.
That's all I got for now. Goodbye.
No comments:
Post a Comment