Thursday, April 29, 2010

Commercial Interruption

Meanwhile, back at the computer, I started typing again. What wild words of wit and wonder will I bring forth? I am always curious where I am going. I am about to enter my fourth month of blog entries and I have one follower. My popularity has never been higher. I best patronize my follower else I lose them...

Dear Follower,

Please don't get dizzy following in my circles. Your loyalty is inspiring. I shall push on and try to widen the path on which I trek and seek new and brighter destinations. (This is called a come-on or promise of a better tomorrow. The idea is to lure the reader on with their own curiosity.) Stay, my precious one, and I shall never cease to entertain you with my blundering style of prose. (This is another good way to secure readership. Flattery combined with humility.) My goal is bring smiles and laughter, and I only improve with age. So hang in there, fan of mine, the best is yet to come. (This is an unknown. I am not Nostradamus. People like being assured that the future holds nothing but the best, so a white lie never hurts.)

Sincerely, (This is sincere)
John (Not an alias)

Perhaps I could obtain more readers if I advertise...

Have I got a blog for you.
Thrills, spills, laughter and tears!

Read the never-ending adventures of some tall old man with a hankering for attention.
Will he have another drink? Will he go to bed?
The suspense in titillating.

Subscribe to "Just a Blog, Nothing More" and we'll throw in "The Void (a story in progress.)"
No assembly required. Cherry flavor also available.

And you may ask "What does this cost?"
Our answer, "Not $50, no. Not $20 either."
If you act now, for a limited time only, we give you both blogs and a bonus story called "Tumble in the Night" for the mere click of a button.
That's right. No money necessary.
Just click the "Follow" button on the upper left hand of the screen and you are golden.

Please ignore the clause where you are to turn over your first born child to John.
He hasn't demanded one yet and hopefully he will maintain this policy.

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