Sunday, April 11, 2010


This is where I let my mind roam. I never know what I am going to write about until I am writing it. And even then I do not know in what direction I am heading. I have no subject at hand. Yet I am pounding out these words.

Suddenly, Pipsi, the little Jewish girl who had been turned into a cow by a band of roving gypsies, kicked her stall door open. She mooed triumphantly as she left the barn to search for her parents. If she could somehow relay to her folks what had transpired, perhaps they could make the gypsies turn her back into a human.

And so it goes. These random thoughts cross my mind and I type them out. I have no idea why a band of gypsies would transform a little girl into a cow, yet in my head this has occurred. Why was the little girl Jewish? Not because her parents were Jewish. That's too easy. She converted to Judism of her own free will. Could be the reason the gypsies turned her into a cow. Ah! The young girl was also a gypsy, and because she changed her religion, the gypsies decided to teach her a lesson by showing what happens if you change into something you should not. Life isn't always what you make it, sometimes life makes you what it wants.

Wait, I just re-read my original paragraph. It seems that Pipsi is seeking out her parents. If her parents were gypsies, then why would she want to get back with the people who changed her into a cow? Maybe her parents were not there when the rest of the gypsies put the cow curse on her. Yeah, okay, that might work. Her parents may have been away doing a grift. Some kind of con where they do construction work with shoddy materials at exorbinant prices. Mom is the sales person. Dad does the work and collects the money.

So now we have a cow by the name of Pipsi wondering through the countryside in search of her human parents. Pipsi is smart enough to know to stay off the main roads, she wouldn't want the farmer retrieving her back to the barn. The farmer who owns the barn that housed Pipsi is Chesty McBabe. He was born Chester McBabs, but with a name like that, it was only natural for the townfolk to nickname him Chesty McBabe.

Chesty bought Pipsi the cow from a door to door cow salesman. That was what the gypsy claimed to be and Chesty believed just about anything anybody would tell him. The gypsy who sold Pipsi was the one who had turned her into a cow. He did not turn her into a cow because she was Jewish. He did it so he could sell her and make a few bucks. After all, the girls parents were away. Who would complain?

So I got to throw out my "teaching Pipsi a lesson" reason. I still like the idea, but no motive other than financial gain, is more believable. And I want to make my story believable. Okay, let's see... Pipsi has traveled across the countryside undetected and she is approaching suburbia. She spots her father putting up fake aluminum siding on one of the houses. She rushes across the road and gets hit by semi-truck. The truck driver does not stop, but the father has seen it all. He hurries to dying cow. The last thing Pipsi sees in this life is her father looking down at her. The last words she hears is her father saying, "Oh boy, steak tonight!"

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